[QM] 12 - "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."

I'm not exactly sure what people expect to gain when they have this sort of mentality. Keeping your enemy close, sometimes ends up hurting those friends you are trying to keep close to you. Trust me, I know these things.

Having the best intentions, thinking that it's either him or me... any of that isn't going to do anything in the end because in the end all you really have is yourself. I'm sure I'm just spouting off even more phrases that don't amount to actual facts that someone can draw upon, but it's the way I think these days.

I've been burned by the enemy, haunted by the choice I made because it put me close to that enemy and pushed me away from my friend. I am all in favor of keeping your friends close. Hell drug them, tie them up if it's for their own good... if it keeps them out of trouble, of course don't expect them to just accept those choices without a fight.

They're your friend, fighting with you is what they do the best. They know your weak spots, all those sensitive topics that you've shared with the hope that they'll use that information for good... not evil.

The reality of a statement like this one though, is that your friend... no matter how close you keep them, can one day be close enough to become your enemy. I'm not saying it'll happen to everyone, but there are times in someone's life when the thing you can say... the words you choose are going to be ones you wish you hadn't said... the moment they slip from your lips.

When you have friends that are that close to you... it's almost second nature to know where to kick them when they're down.

[QM] 13 - "Well, ya know, 'could be worse."

Cancer. It's a word that when you say it... even the slightest hint of it can send someone into having an emotional breakdown within seconds. You utter a word like lymph nodes, biopsy, malignant... growth... there are just words that a doctor has to say in their day to day that just hit people a bit harder than a common cold would.

Those are the moments when I realize just how much my job can suck. Telling people the bad news, the there's no hope sort of news just takes out all the actual joy of being a doctor. There are joys to being a doctor too, but none of them have to do with relaying the bad news to someone. There is also no good time to say, 'It could be worse' because to them this is the worst thing they could hear. This isn't a flat tire on your car and being glad that you're not out of gas as well.

This is cancer. This means so many more things than just the diagnosis. It means treatment, and family counseling. It means prayer or finding religion for the first time, or leaving it for the last time. It's a lot of things, but it's only after everything has settled that you can finally look forward to thinking what could have been worse.

I just know most my patients don't ever want to think that way, because that's already more negative thinking than they want to feel at the moment.